Banks for Nothing

The banks.  The banks are upset because they’re getting some long overdue regulating.  It’s regulating that’ll cut into their profits, say these banks.  What are they going to do about a little scrap of their billions getting peeled away?  Take it out on their customers of course!  It’s the bank way.  What they’ve decided to do, to recoup that lost profit (and likely pocket even more than before) is charge their customers who make purchases using their debit card a monthly fee.  Bank of America will be taking 5 bucks from each customer who has entrusted them with their money.  Wells Fargo and Chase only want 3 bones each month – aren’t they nice?

This is a petty reaction.  The banks are petulant children throwing a hissy fit because they’re being told to behave.  Have some ethics, they’re being told.  Give a little.  Share.  Don’t rip small businesses off.  But the banks don’t want to share their toys because, well… MINE!  MINE!  MINE!  If they’re being forced into semi-ethical behavior, then they will take it out on their customers.  After all, is it not the banks who are doing us such a huge favor by taking our money?  I mean, they don’t exist by the consent of the people who deposit their money there.  Hell no!  Why should the banks even pretend that they need customers.  If they place ridiculous fees on their meager services, then the customers will pay and the customers will become outraged – rightfully outraged – and misdirect their anger toward that big bad over reaching government with it’s commie Muslim president who probably wants to see the banks fail, by God!  The customers get the shaft.  The banks get the green.  The government gets the blame.  It’s a corporate paradise.  A fool proof plan.  The banks say, “We’re sorry.  The government made us do it, you see.  Our hands are tied.  They made us.  Don’t blame us.  The devil made us do it.  Blame the devil.  Or if you can’t do that could you just hate the sin but love the sinner?”

Lazy banks.  They won’t even count my change anymore.  I know they must still have one of those machines back there, but they won’t use it.  I don’t have time to count pennies by the hundreds.  Please, it’s US currency. Legal tender.  Take it you prick!  Roll it up and shove it up your ass – I’ll pay the fifty cent fee for that service.

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