K-9 to 5

I’d like a manual labor dog
To work all day
and howl away pain under the moon

Science can figure this out
They grew an ear on a mouse back
made pigs glow green
cloned sheep
And if mammoths are coming soon
What’s the problem?

A dog with opposable thumbs
Little dog sized ones
Grafted right onto the paws
Along with four hairy fingers
Front legs and back
paint the house
pave the road
doggedly man the line
they can work the dog biscuit factory
toil in the squeaky bone mines
manufacture flea collars
because right now
men are doing this in shifts
day and night for the dogs
1st, 2nd, 3rd
‘round the clock
24 hour dogshit

I’m not asking much
A Lhasa
for light typing
A Rhodesian
for rubdowns
A Toy Fox
to drink-fix
And a Dandie Dinmont for…
precisely what you’d think a Dandie Dinmont for
and no more

but the special jobs,
hard toil,
heavy labor,
work not fit for a dog
goes to the beautiful Basenji
the African mongrel
who doesn’t yip; doesn’t yap
can’t bark or go “wuff”
perfection, silent, taking it

too bad there’s no way
its bark is worse than its bite


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